Sunday, October 24, 2004

weirdly enough..this whole week..i feel like iv been alone when im with people...i dun wanna say that things arent diffrent...but they are..everynight i juz end up crying myself to sleep n like i dunno..im just feeling like well distant from him and evryone else...hell...i dont know whats happening between us...its like as thou he doesnt even bother anymore..i don't even know what im suposed to do now...i dont know what to tell him...how to tell him..hell part of me just wants to give up and let go...i mean if he doesnt feel the same way i feel then why am i still holding on to something that isnt there anymore.. its funni..when i say i miss him its not miss him being around...its more of i miss him fully..its like he'z around physically but not really around u kno...i hate feeling this way...it feels as though theres no more hope...i know he cares but things just feel diffrent..i cant pinpoint what it is but it just does...im dont expect him to do anything or say anything and i dont want him to do something like suggest us meeting just cos he doesnt want me being upset or whatever...if he doesnt want it id rather not go through with it..like i sed..id rather walk away..n i dun even expect anything anymore..i only end up getting disappointed in the end n then i take out my anger n upsetness on him n well thats something i oredi told myself not to do anymore.....

posted by naddz @ 11:36 PM

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