Monday, November 29, 2004

a fren of mine who i confided in recentli told me sumtin..that i shuldnt hang with idham n well shez ryt...i mean yes i dun hev feelins for him but he likes me n hez makin moves on me...althou sf didnt seem botherd by it i know he prolly was...guess to me it was nothin but wen she askd me how id feel if his ex suddenli did that n well i gta admit id b pretty pissed too...but like now...wer not together but like when im with him i feel like nothings changed...juz that i know we'r not in a relationship nimore...sure when we'r not together n when i think bout it i do feel like cryin wic i do(yest at mcd)....n its crazy...when i pass by any store that we ever went to...even once n i cen remember what happnd then....n i juz feel likewell crap...i wish i culd juz turn back time n change everythin i did...i know that if i hev to ill wait for him...but if he doesnt wanna b with me then ill prolly wait a few years b4 gettin involved with any other guy...i jus hate the feelin...mayb im juz destined never to actualli fall in love n stay in love..1st ther was hafiz..n well we all kno wad happend..n it took me 9 months to get over a guy i was with for less than a month...n then he came along n i tot mayb this could b well it...but the cynical me was right...things didnt last n again my heart got broken....i tink if it gets broken one more time i myt as well juz date arnd n not give a shit bout feelings n stuff...wads the point..il get hurt in the end anyway...myt as well not take that risk again n save myself the tears...im sick n tired of crying myself to sleep n crying b4 i go to work n durin my break n after work...shit..im doin it now..bloody hell...fuckin hate this lah.ok get a grip...dun b such a weakling can...i know im not the suicidal typ...haha thank god...ill juz feel like crap n thats all...n now its like..shalins not arnd so i cant go to her n fathrul well need i say more..so now im facing all this on my own....since i cant talk to ni1 bout this the onli thing to do is pretend im ok..juz go on bein brave,,i kno i can do this...no matter how many tears i gota cry...how many times i feel like breakin down or juz leaving...

posted by naddz @ 7:53 AM

3 Comments:

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