mentally unstable

this is the most tiring week the year...

exams ended thursday..spent fri at home..recuperating..hah..

went to sentosa with the YCP people on sat..

i was kinda half wanna go half dont wanna go..

ended up having so much fun..

although..i did feel like crying halfway through it..

cos well..it was exactly two years ago that i was there too..

with sophan..urgh..dun wanna tink abt it anymorelah..thats the past..

the rehearsal was darn funnilah..

first..my brownie finished in record time..

kinda surprised that people realli do like it..

with shai's antics n i tink the funniest part was yazid learning how to hold hands..

yes LEARNING!!..he didnt kno how to hold a girls hand..haha..

tf had to demonstrate so many tymz..it looked like a perfect "gay" moment..

tink he sengaje wanna hold dhaniah's hand..haha..

and the whole hu hah abt the starfish also classic..

after that..zul, dhaniah n su went off..

me, tf, shai, yazid n faizal went to see shai's ex students perform..

then headed for plaza sing where we had dinner..

we then shared cab(tf n yazid), (me, shai n faizal)..back..

shai was tellin me to stick arnd with YCP..n i will..

m glad that tf kinda roped me in..

ill upload the pics soon..

as for sunday..spent the day helpin my mom do sum stuff..

then had rehearsal at nyt..i bcame the sound gal..

aka juz press play button for the music..

went home n tried to finish up my work but fell asleep..

tink i woke up @ like 12 on monday..

went down to toys r us to settle my cab thingy...

tho 1 of them wasnt supposed to b paid by me..

cos azmil n i shared cab but i got off first then he did..

but the goon lost the receipt n in the end didnt settle..

urgh..i wasnt gna pay like 25 bucks lah..

as for today..

had IAP breifing..

iv got like less than a week b4 it starts...yahoo!!!

gettin arnd 400+ a month..

kinda little..but oklah...

this week will get worse..

2mr gota bake 4 batches of brownies for mothers colleagues(teachers day)..

thurs-sat got camp..im gonna dielah..

arggh!!!!

ps : gdad n mom n i should get special family discount at CGH..

now mother is gna b admitted..gna hev surgery..

total count of how many times my family has been admitted...

gmom - 2000(2*), 2002,2004,2005

gdad- 2006

mom- 2005, 2006

me - 2003, 2004

n thats juz for 2000 onwards..

b4 2000 got a lot more..my family clasic ryt

posted by naddz @ 4:08 PM 0 Comments

ITS OVER!!!!

no more exam..weehee!!!

im literally dancing now..serious..

still super hyper n a bit buzzed from last nyt..hehz..

i need sleep..*yawn*

posted by naddz @ 10:31 AM 0 Comments

mati!!!die!!!die!!die!!!..

today was my sdc paper...aka System Dynamic Controls...

aka...CRAP!!!..

i knew what to do..

i knew how to do..thanks to taufiq n adam teachin me..

but i think i messed it up lah...

oh well..even if i got like 25/100.. theres a chance i myt pass...

haha..next up Aerospace Structures & Sytems 2 and lastly

Aircraft Propulsion Systems...

after thursday night..freedom!!

and hopefully that night..ill b goin MOS!!though id rather hit DBL o..

i miss dancing lah..

and u know what else i miss..

working..

hell i miss toys are us..

i miss running arnd n doin voids, changing money..

counting money, usin the walkie talkie to kacau the big M(usually azhar)..

getting iritated when the customer tries to yaya when im wrappin their gifts..

nightstack n goin home @ 3am..

although i doubt things will still b the same..

n no i dont mean the whole azmil thinglah..

i meant now since erwan, rizal, amos, linda, rai, mark arent arnd..

gosh..i wonder how things have changed..

somehow now im freaked to go back sia..

oh well..iv still got seha, yumiko, banu arnd i guess..

posted by naddz @ 9:59 PM 0 Comments

EPL has started..woohoo!!!

GO LIVERPOOl GO!!!

my beloved Garcia n Alonso not playin tho..oh well..

at least Gonzales is a substitute..

anyyway..iv got a confession to make...

im in love with Paul Walker again!!!..

its all bcos of watchin 2 Fast 2 Furious over n over(i got the dvd)..

he may b what 32..but hez one helluva yummy year old..

swoon..

taufiq is turnin the big 20 2mr..

met him a while 2 pass him his prez...that was funnilah..

as usual.we fought b4 meetin..

n no shaikhah.it is not a sign!!!

from goin arnd bugis with ikah lookin 4 a box n all the frills..

n runnin arnd cs goin 2 develop photo(so kewl sia..develop frm my hp)

n doin up the card like crazy woman(wic i so didnt copy from u)..

im so semangat when it comes to birthdays..

esp love seein the look on the persons face wen gettin the prez..

nwe..Eli..ur next..tho ur case will prob involved some kind of sabo

like..

a)the standard beating.

b)water n flour n eggs bein thrown @ u..

c)gettin dumped in to the pool

d)ur hair gettin cutted by yours truly..

take ur pick...muahahahaha...

posted by naddz @ 8:01 PM 0 Comments

i got posted to TUAS!!!!bloody hell lah!!!!

that was my 1st reaction when i got my atachment...

but after "sir...how come i kena all the way in Tuas??"..

together with my "muka kesian"..

im goin Eagle Services Asia..

ok so i was hopin NOT to go ther since my uncle is there but heck..

ill take it over goddammed Tuas..

if im there might as well buy back atoks house n stay there...

Ashwin got posted there too..

& cnt remember who was sayin i cen get a lift frm him..

bt tink i shuld just rely on myself n take the bus..

takin a lift frm him once in a while is fine bt not everydayla..

other than that..the past few days hev been rough..

kept gettin memory flashes at the wrongest times..

especially whenever i ate pretzels n popcorn..

wore my transformers shirt..

national day was the worst..

grandad got admitted to hospital..

but my mind was on 1 thing..

and remembering 1 day..

the worst was when i took the shuttle bus that fri..i was almost in tears at the end..

dont know how im gna survive the 27th n 28th..

my exams are nxt week n im totally not prepapred..esp for sdc..

die die die!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i think when i say something i should start goin throu with it..

too many times when i decide something i will change my mind..

esp when sum1 turns on their charms on me..

i have to start having self control..

n not letting my heart get the best of me..

what does my heart know anyway..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

didnt even get to see any fireworks this year..

partly cos the only people who asked me to see was eli n the guys..

and partly cos the last time i kinda went to see fireworks was 2 years ago..

n didnt end up seeing it also..

if only sum things stayed the same..

posted by naddz @ 8:11 AM 0 Comments

posted by naddz @ 12:20 PM 0 Comments

shaikhah is like "u havnt updated ur blog!!"...

so now i shall...

1st...Happy BIrthday Yumiko..

next..iv got like 1 more week of skewl..

been stayin back late to finish up my ddacp...drivin me nuts but im surviving..

hope i cen get oryt marks for it..

should kno where ill b goin for atachment soon...

kinda freaked out bout it but lookin forward to it..

miss workin @ TRU...wanna go back but been superbusy with skewl n mom bein mom

how to go back sia..

n with the D&D cmin...god knows if i got enuf money to even wanna go...

...........................................

had a weird dream a few days ago...

think either sophan or coco pops was init..

it felt so darn real..like it happend b4 or sumthin...i also dunno

i juz woke up with that feeling...

like i woke up thinkin the dream was real but realise that it was well..a dream..
...........................................

talked to danny after what seems like forever

he asked me if id rather be with any guy i was remotely attracted to/used to..

or wait for that one person i really loved..& more importantly loved me..

for once i didnt have an answer..i said i would wanna be with the "1"..

..........................................

but i think that there is only one "1"..

and if u met the person the feeling would be entirely diffrent...

from the feeling u get when ur with others..

whenever ur together nothing else matters..

all worries just fade away..

each kiss is like a jolt running through ur body..

and proves that there is a cloud 9..

& somehow u can actually imagine spendin ur life with that person

even when u promised urself u never wanna get married..

but if it doesnt work out n ur not with that person..

u just have to accept it and move on..

although even years after it ended u still feel sumthing when u think of that person..

all the good memories will leave a smile and the bad a tear..

sumhow songs, tv shows and even movies would somehow remind u of what u had..

u still keep little things that remind u of them..

pictures, receipts from ur 1st date, faded ticket stubs, the homework u did together

the book u borrowed when u had to retake maths 2,

the stupid dinosaur won from escape

u know thats all in the past but

deep down u still wish u had sumthing a love like that..

iv alwez felt that..

one has to accept that they might not end up with their one true love..

but they cant lie to themselves and tell themself that they love sum1 when deep inside

theyre just scared of starting over or being alone or letting go after being with that person

for a long time..

or can they??

posted by naddz @ 6:30 PM 0 Comments